This last Sunday when my Pastor gave us a sermon about being thankful, all I could do was cry. I mean, seriously, I cried through almost the whole thing and by the end I was sobbing. Part of it I'm sure was prenancy hormones! But as I sat there through that service, I just was SO thankful!
You see, last year this time, Mr. M was on his way to Iraq. He spent Thanksgiving day on a plane, eating plane food for his Thanksgiving meal. I remember being with his family that day and having to excuse myself to go cry. I remember my 5 year old saying to me, "but what if he dies?" I mean, seriously, how do you answer that?! So I was honest with her. I told her that we will pray every day that he won't, but that if he does, he will get to be in Heaven with Jesus. Not very comforting to a 5 year old, but I just could not promise her that he would come home. That was a hard day, followed by very many more hard days.
There were times I wouldn't hear from him for days. There were times when I would hear explosions in the background and then we would get disconnected. There were times when he would email me and just say 'pray for me today' and I would know that he was going on a mission. There were times were I would get so scared that I would lay in my bed at night and just cry myself to sleep. It wasn't that I was afraid of him dying...I knew that God already had the day that he went home to Heaven choosen, whether he was in Iraq or not. I was afraid of what my life was going to be like without him. I was afraid of raising 3 children by myself without their Daddy. I was afraid of never feeling his arms around me again.
In May 2008, he came home. It has been so wonderful having him home. I feel so blessed. That brings me back to today. I am so thankful to have Mr. M home with us. So many husbands, wives, sons and daughters have not made it back home again to their families. So as we sit around the Thanksgiving table this year and say what we are thankful for, I am sure I will be crying again. Because I am so thankful that my love will be sitting beside me, carving the turkey and smiling that wonderful smile of his. Thank you Lord, for bringing him home to us and for the wonderful baby growing in my womb.